Our Story Begins...

Shutdown hasn't been everything that I hoped it would be.  I started taking classes to finish my reading endorsement in June, figuring that I needed to use this time well.  And, expensively.  I bombed through the second of three classes in the summer and then, started the horrific finisher in the fall, while trying to virtually teach.  What the fuck?  I thought.  I'm not working two jobs right now because I can't and I don't even have to drive to work, saving me a lot of time.  It has been a virtual nightmare.  I spent the Thanksgiving week break writing a sixty-eight page paper.  By choice.  Because by Monday, I have to work again.  

I've utilized some of what I learned during the endorsement.  I administered Kaw the diagnostic assessment of his reading ability the Wednesday before the Thanksgiving week.  I was shoddily taught on how to administer this thing and I tried to do it right, because I only took these fucking classes to figure how to help students that struggle to read.  They say to go two grades below a student's grade, to help build confidence.  He couldn't read any of the words on the second grade list and I had to go to rock bottom.  He was at a frustration level by what is considered a level below kindergarten, though he is in fourth grade.  I tried to pretend everything was okay, congratulating him and telling him he was doing great.  I, personally, was freaking out.  

"Okay, Kaw, thanks for working with me here.  I know this is boring, but I have to figure out what to teach you next.  It will get more interesting." I said after over an hour of diagnostic assessment.  
"Let's call it a day."
"But, can you help me with my other work?  And can you meet with me during the break or on the weekend?" he responded.
 "I am working with Bway Pa at 1:00 to do Social Studies work, do you want to join?  I don't want to wear you out...."
"I'll be there."  he responded, and he was.  

We finished the work.  Paw Ku piped up and presented her screen, she had finished earlier and was looking at pictures of traditional Thai dancers.  We looked at them, while Paw Ku talked about how beautiful they were.  

"Would you visit Thailand again, if you could?"  I asked. 

"NO."  Kaw responded.

"It is too dangerous."

"What if you could go to the  Karen villages, in the north, would you visit there?" I asked.

"I would go there, but the rest of Thailand, too dangerous..." Kaw and Paw Ku responded, unanimously. 

"I looked up the military...."  Paw Ku mentioned, showing her screen again.

"I'm sorry, Paw Ku, stop.  They are showing piles of dead people and we don't need to see that."  I responded.

Piles of dead Karen people.